We're only a few weekends away from the annual St. Clair Shores Punching Festival. It's a great time of seasoned meats and pure aggression. We as a community store up most of our rage through the dark, cold months, then erupt every June in a fury of punches directed at abandoned cars, old furniture and civil servants. Everyone is given a 12 hour pass by local law enforcement so long as nothing gets burned. And even then, if they do catch you torching a tool shed, the most the cops do is sucker punch you in the kidneys a few times and leave you in a heap. It's a great time and the local merchants love the extra foot traffic. Drive over or bring the boat if you can and we'll bloody our knuckles against a bust of old St. Issac down at the abandoned Catholic church. The festival underscores the severe, eternal truth of Southeast Michigan: There is no Escape.

We’re only a few weekends away from the annual St. Clair Shores Punching Festival. It’s a great time of seasoned meats and pure aggression. We as a community store up most of our rage through the dark, cold months, then erupt every June in a fury of punches directed at abandoned cars, old furniture and civil servants.

Everyone is given a 12 hour pass by local law enforcement so long as nothing gets burned. And even then, if they do catch you torching a tool shed, the most the cops do is sucker punch you in the kidneys a few times and leave you in a heap.

It’s a great time and the local merchants love the extra foot traffic. Drive over or bring the boat if you can and we’ll bloody our knuckles against a bust of old St. Issac down at the abandoned Catholic church.

The festival underscores the severe, eternal truth of Southeast Michigan: There is no Escape.

Chris Weagel

Chris Weagel writes about the intersection of technology and parenting for Wired Magazine. No he doesn't. He can't stand that shit.

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