Nightcap 04/23/13

It's reassuring to know that even from a place of utter powerlessness, one still has the ability to use permanent markers to cover one's arms, neck and face with Slovenian curse words.
And buy motorcycles with credit cards.

Nightcap 04/21/13

The primary problem with a cartoon ghost city is one of revolving doors. You cannot build a proper skyscraper without them but no ghost can operate them. Same trouble with those delightful little diner cases of pies.
No you’ll have to completely rework this. Try a werewolf town or a confederacy of alligator men.

Nightcap 04/18/13

We've had a string of those tornadoes that only affect children's tricycles. Sweep through mighty powerful. Winds up to 80. They only suck up tricycles. Throw them clear across the county. Leave everything else untouched. From the leaves on a tree to the hairs on your head. Like nothing ever happened. Perfect. Cept now your tricycles are flung and mangled every which way. Awful. It'll pull one right out from underneath you. Nature doesn't care about your pleasure ride. This is business.
And from the looks of it, we're easing up on that 17 year cycle of flooding that only affects guys named Bill. Whole town does shifts walking around them, holding up garbage bags.
Can't knock it. That's how I met Alice.

Nightcap 04/17/13

The turning point in American decline came with 6 out of 10 adult males self-identifying as “Heavy Diorama Enthusiasts.”

Nightcap 04/16/13

I attach a lot of significance to the kind of foreign postage people affix to their face prior to important job interviews. Helps me get a feel for their loyalties and it tells others they are unafraid to stick things to their heads.
Pinball machines will float, you just have to let them.

Nightcap 04/15/13

Technology is so advanced now, you only need two people inside a full-size dragon costume. Only two!
One to work the arms and another to sit there in its belly, ruminating, growing bitter, wondering what they've done to earn this punishment. Forever questioning what series of choices led them to be trapped, confined and locked away from all humanity, caught in a living death, rank and unforgiving.
And next year that'll be done by a computer!