To me, the best part of roll call is when they call out names of people they know aren't here and never will be. Like, “Dolly Parton,” or, “Bowling Champ Walter Ray Williams!” They aren't part of this organization, we know that. But we wish they were.
And there's no hurt in pretending.
I wait a few seconds in that long pause then I call out, “Not today, Boss, not today.”