Week 4 of the Harpoon Gun Shortage.
We’re gonna have to reason with these squids. They can breathe air and crawl on dry land. And according to the emails, they can control thunderstorms. In this kind of situation – God you just don’t know.
First you couldn’t get the harpoons. The guns? Everybody had the guns.
“My buddy Ken said he could make ’em shoot wax pellets. Hard wax. Just as deadly. I believe it too. But you can’t get no wax in January. The mines are frozen shut. Canned stuff’s covered in oils.”
Then the guns disappeared.
Folks feel embarrassed. They feel shame. To have a gun sit useless on the table or out nailed to the door where people can see. They can see your helplessness. They know “That Man has failed in life. He’s failed in every area that matters.”
So guns are hidden under beds. Behind cabinetry. Some break them into pieces, feed them to dogs. Make it go away.
“People don’t understand. Denial destroyed our local circuses. And it’s about destroyed our harpoon guns.”