Certain allowances have been made. Understandings have been reached. He can start his home stuffed animal factory but the turbines may only operate from sunrise to sunset. None of the resulting stuffed animals may be delivered by cannon. Animal selection must be diverse. Teddy bears and rabbits are fine, but we expect more. We hope to see children hugging stuffed rhinos and millipedes, headless snakes and salamanders this Christmas. The neighbors shall not be disturbed by odd smells or the sounds of the eyeball machine. He can market the stuffed animals under a hong kong label and sew on the wrong number of legs. That's up to him. But if he's going to use our river water and embarrass our grandfathers he'll have to give back.

Chris Weagel

Chris Weagel writes about the intersection of technology and parenting for Wired Magazine. No he doesn't. He can't stand that shit.

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