SANDBOX

Here in the Midwest of the United States we are awfully proud of our ability to stuff numerous toddlers into compact backyard sandboxes. 15 was the longstanding record until this past August when Ingrid Troughton, without mechanical aid, crammed 27 toddler babies into her backyard sandbox and kept them there for almost three hours.

And not small babies, either. We’re eaters in this part of the country and we pass it down through the genes. Some of these babies, to put it politely, have fat legs. That didn’t stop Ingrid. She plopped them all in there, each one buried up to at least their chest, as per regulation.

Feeding isn’t always easy but at around the halfway mark, Ingrid did spray them down with the hose, doing at least three passes before retiring again to the back family room.

Photos are forbidden but it’s true. This actually happened in 21st century America. Authorities were on hand for the official count and adoption agencies supplied, wiped and hauled off the little darlings as needed.