What kind of world doesn't have computers? Computers do everything! They make ice. They make ice sculptures. Human beings were totally alone in the universe before the computers landed. They've shown us the way back to ourselves. I love computers. I love to hug computers and tell them they are the best thing that's ever happened to me. I was thinking of giving the Nobel Prize to my computer for all the help it gave me on my assignments, and I just might still do that. I know a guy who's brother works for them. Thanks to computers - and no thanks to wild animals - I can work all day in just my sandals. No more heavy boots.

What kind of world doesn’t have computers? Computers do everything! They make ice. They make ice sculptures. Human beings were totally alone in the universe before the computers landed. They’ve shown us the way back to ourselves.

I love computers. I love to hug computers and tell them they are the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I was thinking of giving the Nobel Prize to my computer for all the help it gave me on my assignments, and I just might still do that. I know a guy who’s brother works for them.

Thanks to computers – and no thanks to wild animals – I can work all day in just my sandals. No more heavy boots.

Chris Weagel

Chris Weagel writes about the intersection of technology and parenting for Wired Magazine. No he doesn't. He can't stand that shit.

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  • But you don’t have any sandals. All you ever wear are hiking boots and red clown shoes, one on top of the other! I know you said it was for extra warmth, but it is the middle of August.