MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL 08/02/11

Smiling Nitwits are my niche specialty in the Stock Photography World. I handle costuming, location scouting, scenario development and talent-prodding. I photograph them using all digital equipment that requires little touch-up after the fact. These photos are used on everything from Banking websites to Sweatshirts for the infirm.

My bestsellers are photos of happy-go-lucky dimwits enjoying beverages with straws. Second to those are brainless shits grilling meats in backyards. Surprisingly, shirtless men covered in welts surrounded by dogs come in third.

I don’t question any of it. Stock Photography creation is an amoral pursuit. You do it and it is done. Your work may be used to promote a charity or a credit scam. It is not your concern or worry.

Next week I take the smiling nitwits to a water park. And after that I’ll take a few thousand photos of morons eating pork rinds at church fairs.

Victimless Paparazzi.

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About Chris Weagel

Chris Weagel writes about the intersection of technology and parenting for Wired Magazine. No he doesn’t. He can’t stand that shit.

One Response to “MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL 08/02/11”

  1. Maddie Seidel 08/02/11 at 8:43 am #

    … Where do you sell these photographs? Could we find them in magazines?

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