Sometime during the night a baby deer crawled up into bed with me. It’s still sleeping against my legs. I don’t see any broken glass so it must’ve found the emergency key I keep hidden in the yard and let itself in.
If I can move quick enough, I’ll trap it here and dress it up like a human (I keep a spare set of deer-sized clothes in the nightstand). Then I’ll raise it as my new son, Adolpho.
He’ll be my only heir and will inherit everything. So don’t treat him like a freak.