Having a difficult time picking a wall paper pattern that matches my face oil sheen. I wouldn't say I have a quite olive pallor but it's definitely got a green twinge to it. Conflicting with that is my desire for a curdled-blood red motif for the entire room. The wall paper must not clash with my face oil as I plan on returning to my study each evening and wiping my face against at least two walls as part of my meditation program. And I consume a lot of olives and salted fish all day. Which are revolting to my friends and coworkers. And leave your face dripping in poisonous oil.

Having a difficult time picking a wall paper pattern that matches my face oil sheen. I wouldn’t say I have a quite olive pallor but it’s definitely got a green twinge to it. Conflicting with that is my desire for a curdled-blood red motif for the entire room.

The wall paper must not clash with my face oil as I plan on returning to my study each evening and wiping my face against at least two walls as part of my meditation program. And I consume a lot of olives and salted fish all day.

Which are revolting to my friends and coworkers.

And leave your face dripping in poisonous oil.

Chris Weagel

Chris Weagel writes about the intersection of technology and parenting for Wired Magazine. No he doesn't. He can't stand that shit.

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  • Not many would believe it, but my face oil is actually worse. My secret is a near constant intake of garlic sauce over the course of the day and my insistence on taking midnight swims in curdled milk-water every other night.