Morning Constitutional 04/14/11

When you finish eating a popsicle or pudding pop, wipe the stick clean and put it in your pocket. Keep an ever-growing collection of these with you – despite the smell – at all times. Never have fewer than 50.

If you’re the creative type, use a pen to write riddles or bible passages on some of the sticks. Failing that, scribbled cryptic strings of random numbers followed by a bold question mark work just as well.

Some of you may see where I’m headed with this.

Then, the next time you’re in a waiting room or private office with unlocked drawers, wait until your opponent has left the room. When you’re sure you’re safe cram as many of the coded sticks into the drawers as possible. If need be, remove items from the drawers to make room for more sticks. Dispose of these unneeded items in public trash receptacles on your way home.

Check back tomorrow for information on Step Two: Changing Your Name and Fingerprints

About Chris Weagel

Chris Weagel writes about the intersection of technology and parenting for Wired Magazine. No he doesn't. He can't stand that shit.

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