The lawn ornaments are restless.
None of these help...
Tragedy has struck again in St Clair Shores as the Central District Dairy Queen has burned to the ground. Authorities are not certain what caused the fire, though they’ve ruled out sabotage. Due to the explosive nature of the Pineapple Syrup, trawlers reported the fireball could be seen miles from shore. No employees were hurt but the store parakeet, Sandy, perished in her cage next to the Dilly Bar machine. The many Little League and junior Field Hockey teams the store served have been dividing up amongst the town’s other 18 ice cream stands and hot pretzel carts. Not the best start to the season.
Illustration by Matt Mahurin Source: Rolling Stone