Archive - April 2011

Nightcap 04/29/11

A selection of miniature trees is needed. Not next week, not tomorrow, NOW. They shall be arranged in rows, yes, but shall not be uniform in type. Some will be coniferous, some deciduous, others petrified, a few shall bear fruit. One will be dusted with artificial snow and bring good spirits to all who are near. These trees are not to be eaten, nor to be part of any elaborate window display. They are for our edification so that the forest romp following our supper shall not be done in ignorance. Or fear. And those at the table who insist that if one listens oh-so-carefully and precisely and all the stir of the rumpus room shall still, one would hear the song of a microscopic Bird of Pleasure issuing forth from our tiny orchard, shall be regarded as fools who do not know when delight has...

Morning Constitutional 04/29/11

Ever have the unfortunate experience of looking into one of those clear plastic Honey Bear honey bottles only to see, trapped in the golden sludge, a tiny, little human being, a mask of horror locked onto its face? How did he end up there, so far from home? How long has he been in there? Minutes? Years? Why isn’t he just a skeleton? If the honey is that good at preserving his features, what on earth is it doing to my digestive track? Did his village send a search party out for him? Where is his village? Ohio? Think they have charming little bed and breakfasts? Am I just stereotyping? And what of this restaurant? What kind of place is this with little people getting into the food? What’s going on in that kitchen? What’s trapped inside this opaque mustard squeeze bottle...

NOTHING ELSE WILL DO

I could really go for hearing the sound of heavy machinery and furnaces and fixtures being hastily moved in a far off room by ugly, angry men who never wanted to deal with this mess in the first place right now.

Nothing

Google Image Search for "Boat House Caught in Whirlpool" has extremely disappointing returns.

STUDENTS TAKE OVER SCHOOL BOARD

A group of Mexican-American students in Tucson, Arizona prevented their school district from voting on Tuesday night for a controversial measure that would destroy an ethnic studies course that some have called one of the most effective Latin American education program in the U.S. public school system. The students of UNIDOS stormed into the Tucson School District board room chanting, “Education is under attack! What do we do? FIGHT BACK!” Just as the group was making its presence known, with no warning 10 students rushed the board’s seats and chained themselves together as others unfurled a banner that read “UNIDOS Presents The Youth School Board.” They demanded that their program continue, that education be be placed under local control and that Arizona end “anti-indigenous policies”...

I wish he would curse

Obama on Republican attacks on workers:
Let’s make sure we’ve got shared sacrifice and that we make sure that the burden just doesn’t fall on one set of folks. Let’s certainly not blame public employees for a financial crisis that they had nothing to do with. And let’s not use this as an excuse to erode their bargaining rights. So, whether it’s Wisconsin or what we’re seeing in Ohio, I strongly disapprove.

SOURCE

Nightcap 04/27/11

Thing that’s got me worried tonight is that new jellyfish the scientists say ages in reverse. It never dies and can grow as large as a tree. Now the nearest saltwater ocean is roughly 1000 miles from where I type this. I figure I need to either dig another shelter or construct an airship that functions at 35,000 feet where the thin air would make the jellyfish explode which would be wicked cool.
REMEMBER: As we grow weaker, it grows stronger.
And you say the UN is obsolete.